Friday, April 23, 2010

Carbon Neutrality at last

Today when I checked my email, I opened one from a company called Kaufda. Now, let me tell you, I have gotten a bunch of scam emails, a couple of requests for link trade, and I even had one place write me and offer me the fat sack o' seed and another just sent me a bird feeder that they would like me to write about 'cause I love free junk, but this just plain silly.

The marketing campaign they have created goes like this: If you write a post about them, they will have a tree planted for you in the Plumas National Forest in northern California. This tree offsets the amount of carbon my blog creates, thereby making my blog carbon neutral. Kaufda's main business is creating websites that take the place of the little supermarket specials pages that are inside newspapers declaring the price of roast beef to the hot deal of the week. This company, theoretically, would save paper and trees. I am not sure how this marketing campaign helps them, but then again, now I know that they exist, so I guess they have check mark in box number one.

So, I figure since we live surrounded by trees we should be able to do stuff like set a pile truck tires on fire and feel perfectly green since we have enough trees to offset the carbon. The idea of carbon credits is like buying an indulgence from the Catholic Church.... "Well, we have this nasty factory, but we spent a bunch of money to make sure this patch of forest cannot be used by the people who live nearby." The money spent on the carbon credit will (of course) not go to the people who can't benefit from the forest resource around them.

I think I should kick it up a notch and ransom trees. Cuff their branches behind their trunks, slap a hood on 'em and hold a chainsaw to their ,uh, necks? "Five bucks or little Johnny Brownbark here ends up in the chipper by morning." Choke on that.

Now, I am all for using less paper, although I live in a community that is supported by the price of timber. If paper went out of style, this place would be abandoned in two weeks. I am not sure if Kaufda is really going to plant my tree or not after I send them my link to this, but with all the, er, STUFF grown in Nor Cal forests these days, I am not sure it's a safe place to raise a baby tree anyway.

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